The holidays are here…


Now that’s a legacy, Carol Spooner.
(Minus Miss Hayley who hates fish…)
The holidays are here, and I receive as many condolence cards as Christmas. I think the cards are a very sweet gesture, it lets me know that people are thinking about my family and the pain we feel.  I have way more good days then bad, and that alone will make you feel bad. I wonder why I am OK, and some people who lose a parent lose their self.  Heck, Dog the Bounty Hunter started using crack cocaine when his mother died…makes me think he loved his mom more, and I think that is impossible.
I do have one pet peeve, and that’s when someone says “I am sorry about your mom, but it wasn’t unexpected” like that makes it easier.  Or, something with the caveat “you knew she was going to die”. Really? Well everyones mom is going to die, and no matter what, it sucks. Our journey to death may have been different than others, but once your loved one is dead, it’s a level playing field. Gone is gone. From that day forward, the pain is real no matter how they died.  At first I agreed with the person, I mean,  they didn’t mean to minimize my pain, but that’s how I see it. When this happens, and it does often, I know it’s a time for me to offer nothing but grace…AFTER I explain, gone is gone.  I miss my mom, and I miss watching the way my dad loved my mom.  I miss her sweet smell, that is slowly fading from my world. But, when I step back and look at my family,  and the legacy my mom has left, I am reminded how great my God is.

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